Based on The House on Mango Street by Sandra Cisneros.
The following is an imaginary journal kept by Esperanza, a character in the book The House on Mango Street. This account, of course, is written by me. :)
Dear Journal,
My name is Esperanza, and my family and I make six; Mama, Papa, Carlos, Kiki, Nenny and me, Esperanza; all living under one roof on Mango Street, hoping for a better life. Mama and Papa always told us; in the times when we were moving from place to place, always concerning ourselves with which pipes worked and which lights turned on; that we would have a home of our very own someday. And now that we have that we have a house, I've found that a house isn't neccessarily a home. A home is like the houses you see on TV; with winding staircases, enough bathrooms for privacy, and a big backyard with a beautiful garden. They're places that you can point to without feeling ashamed. A house is just a place you take shelter in until you get a home. This place we're in now, so small and rundown, is no home; it's only a house..... period. It's not what they promised us at all.
I don't have many friends. Nenny is my sister and follower.... Although she's a lot like me in some ways, she isn't really a friend; just someone I must concern myself with until she gets a life of her own. I have to change my ways and the people I hang out with so they don't have a bad influence on her. Cathy Queen of Cats is my friend, too but only until Tuesday, when she moves away from the neighborhood that "is getting bad." She told me every person I should know about in the neighborhood; like Joe, the "baby napper" and stuck-up Alicia who went to college. She also told me that someday she would find her distant grand-cousin on her father's side and inherit lots of money because she is the great great grand cousin of the queen of France. Everyone here dreams of the world beyond Mango Street, but most never leave..... I don't want to be stuck here forever. I hate living here. I don't think it's fair that anyone should be so poor that they're stuck living in this miserable pit in which, if you're stuck, it's nearly impossible to climb your way out.
Life isn't fair in so many ways; like I don't think its fair I got stuck being born in the Chinese year of the horse, which is unlucky since I'm a girl. The only reason I think the Chinese say this is because their culture, like my Latin culture, doesn't look approvingly on women that are strong. My great-grandma was a woman born in the year of the horse too, and just like me, her name was Esperanza. Her story makes me sad because she was like me in the sense that she had dreams and that she didn't want to marry, only she didn't get to fulfill her aspirations because Great- Grandpa put a sack over her and carried her as if he thereby owned her. She was a very sad person afterwords... I don't want such a sorry fate.
Yours,
Esperanza
Dear Journal,
I just made two new friends today. Rachel and Lucy are sisters and they're from Texas. Actually, Lucy was born in Texas. Rachel was born here on Mango Street. Cathy said I shouldn't be friends with them but I ignored her. I liked them even though they were dirty and stinky..... Anyway, they're my friends now because we bought a bike three ways; four if you count the 2 dollars I stole from Nenny. Cathy left after I bought the bike with them. I don't care though because now I have two friends and a bike instead of a friend that would only be my friend until Tuesday. We rode all over the place; three on one bike; all around the block. Lucy pedalled, I had the backseat and Rachel was on the handlebars. It was lots of fun. We're going to take turns from now on. They don't know about Nenny though and I'm sure she'll want a turn too.
The new boy moved into Cathy's old house. His name is Meme Oritz. His real name is Juan, but he likes Meme better. The only person who calls him Juan is his mom. He has a grey-eyed sheepdog that is really clumsy. We had our First Annual Tarzan Jumping Contest. He won but, in the process, broke both his arms.
Meme's mom is renting out the basement to a Puerto Rican family. Louie is the oldest, and he has a cousin, Marin, that comes all the way from Puerto Rico. She's older than me, and very pretty; always singing and dancing by the doorway in her short skirts and nylons. Boys like her. She tells us lots of important girl stuff like which creams are best and how to tell how many boys like you. She also shows us her love letters. She is forever dreaming of the man that will change her life...... forever.
One time, Louie's other cousin came over. We were playing volleyball in the alley when we saw him. He had a really nice yellow Cadillac with fancy carpets, a radio, automatic windows and everything! Everyone asked where he got it. He didn't say. He gave us a ride, and it was great, until, on our second time around Mango Street, we heard sirens. The police were following us. Louie's cousin made everybody get out of the car, which crashed into a lamppost. Louie's cousin wasn't hurt very much, but he was arrested. We waved goodbye as the police drove away.
Yours,
Esperanza
Dear Journal,
Yesterday, we got to wear high heels for the first time. A lady gave us them in a bag, for free, for nothing; and Lucy, Rachel, and I were happy because they fit just right. All of us were trading one color for the other until everyone liked the ones they were wearing. We took off our socks and Rachel, who was the best strutter, taught us how to walk in heels; the way to walk if you want to catch a boy's eye. Mr. Benny said we had no bussiness wearing the shoes and walking like that. He said we were too young and that he knew our mother's would disapprove, He told us he'd go to the police. We just ran. We said we'd never wear any other shoes again. But the bum man changed our minds when he tried to force Rachel to kiss him. We didn't like those shoes so much anymore.
Today wasn't much better. Mama wrote a note so I could stay after school and eat at the canteen. That means you get to stay at school and eat lunch. Mother Superior wouldn't let me. She said I lived to close. She said I lived accross the boulevard four blocks away. I don't but I didn't say anything. I won't be allowed to eat at the canteen tomorrow.
Yours,
Esperanza
Dear Journal,
I went to my little cousin's baptism a few days ago. Mama got me new things to wear but forgot the shoes so my feet were scrunched up in my old saddle shoes. I was ashamed. My cousin by first communion, something like that, asked me to dance. I refused; my feet swelling all the while. Uncle Nacho pulled me out of my seat and we showed off the new dance I had learned and, the whole night, that young man watched me dance.
Yesterday, we made up jump rope songs about hips. Nenny, as usual, was completely ignorant and made up some stupid rhyme about a train. Younger sisters can be so naive!
Today, though, I got my first job so I can help pay for my private schooling. I got to inless I want to be in public school. Papa says you only go there if "you wanna turn out bad". So, I'm stuck with a job. I thought I'd get an easy one like everyone else but, before I had a chance to decide, Aunt Lala had found me a job at Peter Pan Photo Finisher. I had to match the negatives with their prints, and put them in an envelope. It was really easy; only, at first, I didn't know when to sit down. I just imitated the lady's next to me. Finally, they told me I could sit down and stand up whenever I wanted. At lunch, I was scared to eat in front of everybody so I ate in the bathroom stall real fast, had a lot left over, and went back to work early. During break time, I didn't know where to go and went in the coatroom. When the next shift came, I met an old Oriental man. We started talking about my first starting and then he asked whether, because it was his birthday, I would give him a birthday kiss. I thought it no harm but, before I knew it, my lips were touching a sour mouth that wouldn't let go.
Yours,
Esperanza
Dear Journal,
Such a horrible time this is for the women in Mango Street. Aunt Lupe; once a swimmer with strong, powerful legs; was sick for a long time. She, the one person who truly listened to and loved my stories, my poems, my favorite books, and to that of my friends; just died. And the very day she died, we played a game.... a cruel game. We; Rachel, Lucy and I; tried to imitate the people we knew, and we chose Aunt Lupe; lying back screeching; thrusting pur heads forward..... laughing. How horrible we were! Many other women and girls don't have it much better. Ruth, my only grown-up friend, lives with her mother and always talks of the day when her husband will bring her back home. He never does. She likes my books and poems too, and likes when I read to her because she's too tired to read. Minerva, who writes poems like I do, is beaten by her husband and always has bruises. Alicia works the day doing "women's work" for her father, and all night studying so she can be well educated enough to get out of this pit. Pretty Sally, my friend from school, was beaten by her daddy. He wouldn't even let her go outside. She got married young; needing a way to get away. That day when I waited for her and that boy to show up by the clowns, a boy took me away and he hurt me..... It made me see that the fairytales about love are lies. For the unlived dreams and suffering of all these women, including me, I've got to get away; even if I'm not pretty or special. When I went to Lucy and Rachel's baby sister's funeral, I met three ladies who promised to grant me a wish, and without hesitating, I knew what it was; to get away. They said I had to come back for the others once I left... that I was the only one that could make things better in this pit called Mango Street; maybe make this place a home........ for somebody.
Yours,
Esperanza
P.S. I'm saying goodbye to Mango Street, but I'm going somewhere better..... somewhere like the poem says.
*~My home -- The One for Which I've always hoped~*
All in white
With little green shutters
The sun real bright
Where lights turn on and the pipes don't putter
Where I can be happy
With all that surrounds me
Where I can appreciate the true beauty
Of Mother Nature's true majesty
In gardens with flowers lavender and red
Creating the perfect flower bed
Where I can be happy to be me
That's where I want to be.....
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Dear Journal,
My name is Esperanza, and my family and I make six; Mama, Papa, Carlos, Kiki, Nenny and me, Esperanza; all living under one roof on Mango Street, hoping for a better life. Mama and Papa always told us; in the times when we were moving from place to place, always concerning ourselves with which pipes worked and which lights turned on; that we would have a home of our very own someday. And now that we have that we have a house, I've found that a house isn't neccessarily a home. A home is like the houses you see on TV; with winding staircases, enough bathrooms for privacy, and a big backyard with a beautiful garden. They're places that you can point to without feeling ashamed. A house is just a place you take shelter in until you get a home. This place we're in now, so small and rundown, is no home; it's only a house..... period. It's not what they promised us at all.
I don't have many friends. Nenny is my sister and follower.... Although she's a lot like me in some ways, she isn't really a friend; just someone I must concern myself with until she gets a life of her own. I have to change my ways and the people I hang out with so they don't have a bad influence on her. Cathy Queen of Cats is my friend, too but only until Tuesday, when she moves away from the neighborhood that "is getting bad." She told me every person I should know about in the neighborhood; like Joe, the "baby napper" and stuck-up Alicia who went to college. She also told me that someday she would find her distant grand-cousin on her father's side and inherit lots of money because she is the great great grand cousin of the queen of France. Everyone here dreams of the world beyond Mango Street, but most never leave..... I don't want to be stuck here forever. I hate living here. I don't think it's fair that anyone should be so poor that they're stuck living in this miserable pit in which, if you're stuck, it's nearly impossible to climb your way out.
Life isn't fair in so many ways; like I don't think its fair I got stuck being born in the Chinese year of the horse, which is unlucky since I'm a girl. The only reason I think the Chinese say this is because their culture, like my Latin culture, doesn't look approvingly on women that are strong. My great-grandma was a woman born in the year of the horse too, and just like me, her name was Esperanza. Her story makes me sad because she was like me in the sense that she had dreams and that she didn't want to marry, only she didn't get to fulfill her aspirations because Great- Grandpa put a sack over her and carried her as if he thereby owned her. She was a very sad person afterwords... I don't want such a sorry fate.
Yours,
Esperanza
Dear Journal,
I just made two new friends today. Rachel and Lucy are sisters and they're from Texas. Actually, Lucy was born in Texas. Rachel was born here on Mango Street. Cathy said I shouldn't be friends with them but I ignored her. I liked them even though they were dirty and stinky..... Anyway, they're my friends now because we bought a bike three ways; four if you count the 2 dollars I stole from Nenny. Cathy left after I bought the bike with them. I don't care though because now I have two friends and a bike instead of a friend that would only be my friend until Tuesday. We rode all over the place; three on one bike; all around the block. Lucy pedalled, I had the backseat and Rachel was on the handlebars. It was lots of fun. We're going to take turns from now on. They don't know about Nenny though and I'm sure she'll want a turn too.
The new boy moved into Cathy's old house. His name is Meme Oritz. His real name is Juan, but he likes Meme better. The only person who calls him Juan is his mom. He has a grey-eyed sheepdog that is really clumsy. We had our First Annual Tarzan Jumping Contest. He won but, in the process, broke both his arms.
Meme's mom is renting out the basement to a Puerto Rican family. Louie is the oldest, and he has a cousin, Marin, that comes all the way from Puerto Rico. She's older than me, and very pretty; always singing and dancing by the doorway in her short skirts and nylons. Boys like her. She tells us lots of important girl stuff like which creams are best and how to tell how many boys like you. She also shows us her love letters. She is forever dreaming of the man that will change her life...... forever.
One time, Louie's other cousin came over. We were playing volleyball in the alley when we saw him. He had a really nice yellow Cadillac with fancy carpets, a radio, automatic windows and everything! Everyone asked where he got it. He didn't say. He gave us a ride, and it was great, until, on our second time around Mango Street, we heard sirens. The police were following us. Louie's cousin made everybody get out of the car, which crashed into a lamppost. Louie's cousin wasn't hurt very much, but he was arrested. We waved goodbye as the police drove away.
Yours,
Esperanza
Dear Journal,
Yesterday, we got to wear high heels for the first time. A lady gave us them in a bag, for free, for nothing; and Lucy, Rachel, and I were happy because they fit just right. All of us were trading one color for the other until everyone liked the ones they were wearing. We took off our socks and Rachel, who was the best strutter, taught us how to walk in heels; the way to walk if you want to catch a boy's eye. Mr. Benny said we had no bussiness wearing the shoes and walking like that. He said we were too young and that he knew our mother's would disapprove, He told us he'd go to the police. We just ran. We said we'd never wear any other shoes again. But the bum man changed our minds when he tried to force Rachel to kiss him. We didn't like those shoes so much anymore.
Today wasn't much better. Mama wrote a note so I could stay after school and eat at the canteen. That means you get to stay at school and eat lunch. Mother Superior wouldn't let me. She said I lived to close. She said I lived accross the boulevard four blocks away. I don't but I didn't say anything. I won't be allowed to eat at the canteen tomorrow.
Yours,
Esperanza
Dear Journal,
I went to my little cousin's baptism a few days ago. Mama got me new things to wear but forgot the shoes so my feet were scrunched up in my old saddle shoes. I was ashamed. My cousin by first communion, something like that, asked me to dance. I refused; my feet swelling all the while. Uncle Nacho pulled me out of my seat and we showed off the new dance I had learned and, the whole night, that young man watched me dance.
Yesterday, we made up jump rope songs about hips. Nenny, as usual, was completely ignorant and made up some stupid rhyme about a train. Younger sisters can be so naive!
Today, though, I got my first job so I can help pay for my private schooling. I got to inless I want to be in public school. Papa says you only go there if "you wanna turn out bad". So, I'm stuck with a job. I thought I'd get an easy one like everyone else but, before I had a chance to decide, Aunt Lala had found me a job at Peter Pan Photo Finisher. I had to match the negatives with their prints, and put them in an envelope. It was really easy; only, at first, I didn't know when to sit down. I just imitated the lady's next to me. Finally, they told me I could sit down and stand up whenever I wanted. At lunch, I was scared to eat in front of everybody so I ate in the bathroom stall real fast, had a lot left over, and went back to work early. During break time, I didn't know where to go and went in the coatroom. When the next shift came, I met an old Oriental man. We started talking about my first starting and then he asked whether, because it was his birthday, I would give him a birthday kiss. I thought it no harm but, before I knew it, my lips were touching a sour mouth that wouldn't let go.
Yours,
Esperanza
Dear Journal,
Such a horrible time this is for the women in Mango Street. Aunt Lupe; once a swimmer with strong, powerful legs; was sick for a long time. She, the one person who truly listened to and loved my stories, my poems, my favorite books, and to that of my friends; just died. And the very day she died, we played a game.... a cruel game. We; Rachel, Lucy and I; tried to imitate the people we knew, and we chose Aunt Lupe; lying back screeching; thrusting pur heads forward..... laughing. How horrible we were! Many other women and girls don't have it much better. Ruth, my only grown-up friend, lives with her mother and always talks of the day when her husband will bring her back home. He never does. She likes my books and poems too, and likes when I read to her because she's too tired to read. Minerva, who writes poems like I do, is beaten by her husband and always has bruises. Alicia works the day doing "women's work" for her father, and all night studying so she can be well educated enough to get out of this pit. Pretty Sally, my friend from school, was beaten by her daddy. He wouldn't even let her go outside. She got married young; needing a way to get away. That day when I waited for her and that boy to show up by the clowns, a boy took me away and he hurt me..... It made me see that the fairytales about love are lies. For the unlived dreams and suffering of all these women, including me, I've got to get away; even if I'm not pretty or special. When I went to Lucy and Rachel's baby sister's funeral, I met three ladies who promised to grant me a wish, and without hesitating, I knew what it was; to get away. They said I had to come back for the others once I left... that I was the only one that could make things better in this pit called Mango Street; maybe make this place a home........ for somebody.
Yours,
Esperanza
P.S. I'm saying goodbye to Mango Street, but I'm going somewhere better..... somewhere like the poem says.
*~My home -- The One for Which I've always hoped~*
All in white
With little green shutters
The sun real bright
Where lights turn on and the pipes don't putter
Where I can be happy
With all that surrounds me
Where I can appreciate the true beauty
Of Mother Nature's true majesty
In gardens with flowers lavender and red
Creating the perfect flower bed
Where I can be happy to be me
That's where I want to be.....
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
